Rest in peace, Gene Merlino.

I was sorry to hear of singer Gene Merlino’s death on January 8th at the age of 95. The San Francisco-born Merlino found early work in nightclubs and radio (not to mention a vocal group featuring fellow Coastal Book Gal favorite Thurl Ravenscroft), but soon cemented his place in pop culture history. In 1965, he was part of the quartet that recorded the Gilligan’s Island theme song:

Merlino’s singing voice later graced three episodes of The Simpsons:

The most intriguing aspect of Merlino’s career is featured in Jamie Meltzer’s 2003 documentary Off The Charts: The Song-Poem Story. Remember those ads in the backs of magazines from record labels you never heard of, offering to turn readers’ poems into “hit records” for a (hopefully) small fee? Using pseudonyms (most often Gene Marshall), Merlino recorded more than 10,000 of these song-poems by his count. Watching the movie, I was amazed at his ability to nail songs on the first take with little to no rehearsal. His occasional displays of artistic temperament in the film were strangely touching, proving that he always brought his best to every project. The most famous of these is probably 1970’s “Jimmy Carter Says Yes,” which will lodge in your head forevermore:

The radio station WFMU, which has done much to bring these song-poems to light, features a full page of Gene Marshall mp3s here. Here’s to the underrated, unassuming, yet undeniably iconic Gene Merlino!

Rest in peace, Gordie Howe.

I know I’m just one of the countless hockey fans stunned by the death of NHL Hall of Famer Gordie Howe today. Even though he was 88 years old and had suffered ill health these past few years, it’s hard to imagine the hockey world without him in it. While his on-ice achievements are too lengthy to list here, I’ll admit that his writing made me admire him most. I read his 2014 memoir Mr. Hockey expecting the voice of a grizzled veteran, which made the passages involving his lifelong romance with his wife Colleen that much more touching. I teared up a few times reading the letters that he wrote during their courtship. They weren’t flowery love notes at all, but honest and terse in a way that showed that he was overwhelmed by his feelings. I came away from the book with renewed faith in the world, and amazed that I never knew how cool Colleen and Gordie Howe were before.

I’m sure Mr. Howe would frown at my sappiness, so I’ll leave you with my other Gordie Howe memory. You may recall the “Bart The Lover” episode of The Simpsons, where Bart creates an imaginary boyfriend for Mrs. Krabappel as a prank. When Bart has to send her a picture of Woody, he encloses a photo of Gordie Howe. On the commentary track of the third season’s DVD, the writers reveal that Howe’s sons told them that he loved that episode, and felt honored to be chosen. Awesome, right?

There will never be another one like him.

The Coasters = The Simpsons

I was listening to a compilation of the beloved R&B group the Coasters, and wondered what draws me to these songs. Then the thought hit me: The Coasters’ hits are basically templates for classic episodes of The Simpsons, decades before that show existed. Don’t believe my theory? Behold the startling evidence below:

SPOOKY PARALLEL #1

COASTERS SONG: “Sorry But I’m Gonna Have To Pass”

A man rebuffs a woman’s advances after considering the virtues of his true love.

SIMPSONS EPISODE: “Colonel Homer”

Homer rebuffs Lurleen Lumpkin’s advances after considering the virtues of Marge, his true love.

SPOOKY PARALLEL #2

COASTERS SONG: “Stewball”

A guy, down on his luck, bets on the racehorse Stewball in a desperate attempt for cash.

SIMPSONS EPISODES: “Krusty Gets Kancelled”

Krusty the Clown, down on his luck, bets on a racehorse in a desperate attempt for cash.

“Simpsons Roasting on an Open Fire”

Homer and Bart, down on their luck, bet on greyhound Santa’s Little Helper in a desperate attempt for cash.

SPOOKY PARALLEL #3

COASTERS SONG: “Wake Me, Shake Me”

A guy barely drags himself to work, because his detested boss slave-drives him in a dead-end job.

SIMPSONS EPISODE: “Homer The Smithers”

Homer barely drags himself to work at the nuclear plant, because Mr. Burns slave-drives him in his new personal assistant job.

SPOOKY PARALLEL #4

COASTERS SONG: “What Is The Secret of Your Success?”

A guy expresses envy towards an acquaintance.

SIMPSONS EPISODE: “Mr. Plow”

Barney expresses envy towards newly-successful Homer.

SPOOKY PARALLEL #5

COASTERS SONG: “Charlie Brown”

Prankster Charlie Brown wreaks havoc.

SIMPSONS EPISODES: “The Crepes of Wrath,” “Bart The Lover,” “Bart The Genius,” “Bart Sells His Soul”…how much time do we have, exactly?

Prankster Bart Simpson wreaks havoc.

The Coasters also have songs about bad detectives (gasp, Wiggum!), nagging, voracious hunger, and watching TV! The frightening similarities make me wonder what a Leiber/Stoller Simpsons script would have been like.

Still unconvinced? I leave you with

THE SPOOKIEST PARALLEL OF ALL

VIRTUALLY EVERY COASTERS HIT: King Curtis plays the saxophone.

VIRTUALLY EVERY SIMPSONS OPENING CREDITS SEQUENCE: Lisa Simpson plays the saxophone!

I rest my case.

If this is not a dream sequence, I’m done with THE SIMPSONS!

Count me among the millions heartbroken by this report yesterday:

Homer and Marge Simpson to separate in season 27; Homer to fall in love with a pharmacist played by Lena Dunham

When a show has many years of character development to draw from, its writers should make episodes more and more believable. I’ve never understood why so many gleefully destroy their foundations with stunt plot twists instead. Homer’s unwavering devotion to Marge is the driving force of the series. It’s the underlying motivation for even the most outlandish situations, anchoring the comedy with something viewers can trust…or so we thought. Harry Shearer suddenly looks like a clairvoyant genius for leaving the show next year.

In honor of Star Wars Day…

Like many people, I’ve felt deep affection for Star Wars throughout my life. (Admittedly, I may be a casual fan compared to my childhood buddy Matthew, who’d seen the first movie ten times before he turned eight years old.) The films are always major events, but I particularly relish the unexpected Star Wars crossover moments in popular culture. As a child, I enjoyed the Sesame Street episode where R2-D2 fell madly in love with a fire hydrant. (Poor C-3PO had trouble convincing R2 that the romance would be star-crossed. Then again, as Anthony Daniels admitted about the hydrant years later, “Mind you–she was cute.”) Also, who could forget Mark Hamill on The Simpsons, playing Nathan Detroit in a Springfield dinner theatre production of Guys and Dolls…while sporting full Jedi gear? (Come on, you all know the words: “Luke, be a Jedi toni-i-i-i-ight…”)

I cherish my memories of Star Wars: Where Science Meets Imagination when it came to San Jose’s Tech Museum of Innovation in late 2013. I had to resist fangirl moments when I saw R2-D2 in the flesh (metal?) at the press preview event. The exhibition itself was really impressive, and its examination of droids’ place in society was extremely thought-provoking. (Those who are interested can read the whole article in my book, Going Coastal: Santa Cruz County and Beyond.)

To celebrate Star Wars Day properly, I present my favorite crossover of all to you: the February 23, 1980 episode of The Muppet Show, featuring the Star Wars cast. Mark Hamill is delightful as a bemused Luke Skywalker (who has no desire to appear on a “third-rate variety show”) as well as a desperate, struggling-actor version of himself (who, of course, will do anything to perform with the Muppets). The episode introduces my favorite underrated Muppet Show Muppet, Angus McGonagle (the gargling Argyle gargoyle). Hamill’s appearance with Angus alone…well, just watch, you’ll see. May the Fourth be with you, everybody!

https://www.dailymotion.com/video/x6imfvm

Today in History (December 13)

Today I wish a happy birthday to Kyle Baker, who was born on December 13, 1965. As a cartoonist, Baker has so far won eight Eisner Awards (considered the American comic industry’s equivalent of the Oscars), five Harvey Awards (as voted by his peers), and five Glyph Comic Awards (which recognize the best comics made for and by people of color in a particular year).  His animation work has been seen in Looney Tunes projects, Phineas and Ferb, and Andre Benjamin’s late, lamented (at least by me!) Class of 3000.  Baker is comfortable working in digital formats or pen and ink, creating everything from gritty historical epics to portraits of family life. For me, though, Baker’s genius evokes one work: the immortal The Cowboy Wally Show.

Originally released in 1988, the story has aged incredibly well, the occasional wince-inducing joke aside. Legendary (if controversial) star Cowboy Wally is being interviewed for a retrospective, and so the reader sees his life and work through the pages. That simple premise is fleshed out through countless one-liners, corny yet glorious puns (“Be here next week when Salmon Dave sings ‘I’m A Sole Man’!”), and witty repartee. Cowboy Wally is willing to try anything, which makes him easy to like in spite of his many character flaws. His oeuvre includes the Foreign Legion epic Sands of Blood (featuring the best conclusion to a rousing war movie speech ever), and an extremely low-budget reworking of Hamlet  that defies description. When I watch The Simpsons, I’m sure that Krusty the Clown’s career (not to mention his questionable merchandising) has been heavily influenced by Cowboy Wally’s Shoot-‘Em-Up Laugh Riot.

Baker posted several of his books in digital format online for free last year. So, though it’s no substitute for displaying at least one print copy prominently in your home, you can experience the majesty of The Cowboy Wally Show here. I don’t think any author will ever top Baker’s dedication page:

“Acknowledgments: I blame society.”

 

On this day in history…

The “Rosebud” episode of The Simpsons first aired on October 21, 1993. It’s a fun parody of Citizen Kane, but I love it best for the following reason:

I remember reading an interview where one of the Ramones (sigh, how I miss them!) said that “Happy Birthday” was the hardest song they ever learned, because of the weird chord changes at the end. It’s my favorite arrangement of the song by far.